Why I Hate My Pediatrician

julian exam table

My “banana baby” at his two-month checkup.

I have a new goal in life. Someday, I would like to experience a visit to the pediatrician that does not involve me having a complete meltdown. Luckily, so far, I’ve managed to not have said meltdowns actually in the doctor’s office; they come later, like aftershocks, when I’m at home and can fling off bra and dignity and really let loose.

The first, and more epic, meltdown happened two months ago, at Julian’s two-month appointment. I’ve written elsewhere about my somewhat reclusive new-mama behaviors. I wasn’t one of those adventurous new moms who go straight from giving birth in a hospital to shopping for non-maternity jeans in Anthropologie, baby tucked in a perfectly-wrapped Moby.

I was more like a furtive coyote mother whose den is being encroached upon by Evil Humans, and she is forced to dart out into the night, pup dangling precariously from her jaws, in order to survive. At least that’s how it felt, every time I ventured beyond the warm womb of my house with a newborn. As you can imagine, I didn’t get out much.


White Man with Indian Soul.

So this inaugural visit to the doctor’s office, which is about a 35-minute drive away, felt like a BIG DEAL. I prepared a list of questions I wanted to ask the pediatrician, imagining that she would be a warm, uplifting Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman knockoff who would make me feel competent and normal and reassure me that everything’s fine, and I’m doing a great job, and my baby is healthy, and maybe we could come over to her house later for some hearty pioneer cooking and meet her white husband who nonetheless has the Soul of an Indian.

I particularly wanted to ask her about Julian’s breastfeeding habits. He’d just started doing this weird snacking thing, where he’d dive toward my boob like he’s bobbing for apples, eat aggressively for five minutes, and then just pop off, totally done, totally uninterested in my attempts to lure him onto boob number two. (Spoiler: he’s still doing this.) He seemed sated, but I wasn’t sure he was eating enough.

This anxiety was fed by my tendency to play the parenting comparison game – yes, already, just two months in. Some friends of mine have a baby with these amazing fat rolls all over her cuddly body. Even on her forearms. She’s a delicious Stay Puft Marshmellow Baby, and I used to look at her pictures and wonder, where are Julian’s forearm rolls? Is he not eating enough? Do I have wimpy milk? Then I’d go google “failure to thrive.”

I brought all this new mom anxiety to the appointment with me, hoping to have it dispelled. The visit started out well enough, but by the time the doctor came into the soulless exam room, Julian’s pleasantries had disintegrated into hysterics. On top of missing naptime, he had to get undressed and redressed TWICE, because the first medical assistant completely bungled his measurements. (She’d concluded, for example, that his head was 22 inches around, which was only about EIGHT INCHES OFF. Julian comes from large-headed stock, but that there’s mutant territory.)

Our doctor, who more closely resembled a female Woody Allen than the winky-eyed Jane Seymour, seemed totally weirded out that he was fussy. “Is he always like this?” she asked, looking a little alarmed, because apparently she is the ONE pediatrician on the planet who has never had to examine a crying baby.

Finally, after the poking and prodding, Julian fell asleep on Michael and I told her about his eating habits.

“There’s no way he’s getting what he needs in just five minutes.”

That’s what she said.


Emaciated baby, dreaming.

There’s no way he’s getting what he needs.

I looked over at my baby, who suddenly looked emaciated. He was curled up on Michael’s chest, asleep, no doubt dreaming that he was writhing in the middle of a milkless wilderness, surrounded by shriveled boob cacti. I could almost hear his tiny tummy growling.

There’s no way I’m giving him what he needs.

This, by the way, is THE WORST THING you can say to a new mother. At least to this new mother. For those first two months, breastfeeding was a physical and emotional rollercoaster, and to hear that we were still doing it “wrong,” that my baby was apparently starving, was beyond distressing.

The doctor also seemed particularly bothered that he wasn’t sleeping well at night and that he was only in the 20th percentile for weight (even though he was in the 80th percentile for length and the 98th for head size).

Well, I want to see those the other babies in her practice, the ones who are apparently safely in the 50th percentile in everything, who apparently never scream when being prodded by incompetent medical assistants, and who apparently sleep through the night from birth. SHOW ME THOSE BABIES.

So, after having my fragile new mama soul adeptly crushed, we headed home with our scrawny baby, who now had Band-Aids on his spindly little famine legs from the two-month vaccinations. I spent the next twelve hours cuddling with him in his post-vaccine stupor, feeling like the worst mom on earth.

Throughout the next day, my anxiety held steady, a persistent buzz in the background. I fretfully watched the clock whenever Julian nursed, feeling a twinge of despair when he failed to eat for at least 15 minutes, which was the benchmark the doctor had mentioned.

And then, in the middle of the second night following the doctor’s visit, Julian stopped eating altogether. Cold turkey. Nada. Around 2 AM he stirred as usual, and I rolled over like a sleepy sow to let him eat, like always. But he didn’t eat. In fact, he started screaming bloody murder when I tried to get him to latch on, and it took a warm bath to calm him down. Somehow I managed to get back to sleep, lulling myself into believing that all would be well in the morning.

But it wasn’t. When we woke up, Julian was still refusing to eat.

It may sound ridiculous, but this seemed like an EMERGENCY. I was already obsessing about my baby’s finicky eating habits, worried that he was slowly wasting away, so when he’d refused to eat for about 12 hours, I panicked.

I would have probably gone into full meltdown mode at that point, but my mom managed to calm me down over the phone, assuring me that death was not imminent. I half-believed her, enough to make a successful call to the advice nurse, who suggested we try feeding him breast milk from a cup (we weren’t yet using bottles).

So, armed with this goal, this salvific task, I marched to the bathroom and began to seriously pump for the first time. After about 15 minutes, I had managed to fill two bottles with rich, frothy milk – liquid gold, it’s called, and in that moment I so believed it. Those two bottles were precious boons, brimming with an elixir that would coax my son back into functional babydom.

And then, as I was trying to detach the bottles from the pump apparatus, I spilled that liquid gold, all of it, all over the bathroom floor. Most of it was sucked right up by the bright blue bathmat, forming a large, demoralizing wet spot, and for a mad instant I actually considered wringing the milk from the mat. Then it hit me that there was nothing to salvage, every drop was wasted, my baby was going to starve to death, and I would have to kill myself.

THAT is when I lost it. We’re talking full-scale meltdown here. I collapsed on the bathmat in frenzied sobs, cradling it like a beloved corpse. I went all out. I made Scarlett O’Hara look like Mr. Spock. I pounded my fists against the floor, threw my head back, probably even choked out a few “Why, God? Why????” entreaties.

Even in the midst of my hysterics, it did not escape me that I was literally crying over spilt milk. That just made the whole thing seem even more tragic.

About an hour later, after I’d completely wrung myself out, Julian started eating again. Just like that, the switch flipped back on. Turns out that “loss of appetite” is a side effect of the DTaP vaccine. (THANK YOU, INTERNET.) Which no one thought to mention to us. After a long conversation involving my baby’s eating habits, no one thought to say, “Oh, yeah, and by the way, your baby might randomly STOP EATING FOR AN ENTIRE DAY.”

I came through this whole ordeal with a few nuggets of wisdom.

1) Don’t expect your pediatrician to make you feel normal. S/he is trained to see the abnormal.

2) Your doctor’s tendency to pathologize is like a hungry bear that hangs out at campgrounds and is now accustomed to humans. DO NOT FEED IT.

3) Don’t obsess about the numbers.

4) Don’t look at the clock.

Julian still snacks during the day — if anything, he’s an even more distracted eater now — and then gorges himself on half-hour-long feasts throughout the night. It’s not “normal.” That’s just what he does.

His cheeks have now grown so much that sometimes it looks like his face is melting. But he’ll probably never have forearm rolls. I’ve given up on that dream. Unless his eating habits stay consistent and he goes on serious night binges as an adult, in which case he’ll probably have all kinds of rolls. And I’ll love him anyway.


Face melting.



  1. Deja

    Love this post! And it is funny what I expected from my pediatrician and what I’ve actually experienced, and the two are pretty depressingly far apart. Sounds like you could use a different one, right? I have learned this: I’ve stopped framing anything I’m doing as a question. Meaning, I TELL the doctor we give her one bottle of formula before bed and we are all so much happier; I don’t ask what he or she thinks of this. He or she still ends up telling me, but the whole interaction is different if I pretend to be someone who knows what I’m doing. That said, we have her six-month today with a new pediatrician and I am full of dread. Six month shots are supposed to be particularly awful.

    • Abigail

      I’ve stopped asking questions, too! That’s exactly what I did at our latest visit. I didn’t ask questions, and I also dodged her probing questions about “how he’s sleeping” and “are you feeding him on both sides now?” I basically just told her what she wanted to hear, which is sort of unfortunate. It’d be nice to be able to be totally honest. I hope your visit went well! Poor baby. The shots part is ALWAYS so sad — probably worse for us than for them. 😉

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  2. JayNine

    Oh my darling i had my hands clenched over my face reading and fretting what was going to come next for you…WELL EXPRESSED (no pun intended lol). Good Times, but, I cannot believe a Doctor would put those words out there at all ever. I think you need a new Pediatrician. I would use the wondrous internet for that next! LOL! In the meantime, thank you so much for your candid honesty. You are incredible at retaking every moment and it’s emotion as well as you did. SOO impressed with your writing style. I was really there, mat in hand lol. The truth is, BreastFeeding itself, nothing about it, no one EVER told me, Is Just NOT EASY. Not for Mommy and not for baby. The nurses that stabbed my daughter in the back of the throat with my bloody nipples at the hospital, minimal hours after her birth, never ever in any of my 2 deliveries SAID: “you know, this isn’t going to be easy?!” If it weren’t for my local area Public Health assigned Nurse, that came to do home visits to be sure I got that right–I’d a jumped out my (first floor) window! But…once we got it, isn’t it soo worth it. For Baby and Mommy! GOOD FOR YOU! It’s ALL worth it, its all normal, you’re doing a great job, your baby looks incredibly healthy, and you have lots of support. A hubby helps! Thank you again for great share!

    • Abigail

      Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words. And that awesome pun. I wish I’d been better prepared for how difficult breastfeeding would be, too. And the internet is NOT very helpful in that capacity, because most of the articles I read in the those first weeks said that any pain/discomfort after the first few days was ABNORMAL. Really? Because I’m only NOW getting into the pain-free breastfeeding phase, and it’s taken 4 months.

      • JayNine

        Annnnd… Congrats you’re normal, I or as normal as I–was about 4.5 months when the entire world just started to settle and I got to look at the world past my nipples! LOL! It was crazy. My house, literally nothing was done for 4 months. I was a milk dispensing couch cow. And I LOVED IT, LOL!

  3. Noelle

    My daughter is 13 months and much of what you’ve written in your posts mimic my experiences with freakish similarities. Two thoughts on this post. 1. Breast feeding has made me insane in both good and bad ways (again, I think your older post captures this nicely). I’m so grateful for the women at LLL whom I have called in a panic because of latch issues, feeding times, pumping issues and supply issues. Nobody can tell you what BFing is going to be like for because every mama and child is different (and I took classes and talked to my friends and family. None of that prepared me for the realty of BFing) The one constant truth is that it is HARD. So, pat yourself on the back. You’ve made it this far and your babe looks to be thriving! Well done, Mama. Well, done. 2. Having a medical figure who can encourage and support you in your decisions to raise your child is important. I’m sorry you had such an horrible experience with your ped. If you do switch to another, at least you’ll have a better idea of what kinds of questions to ask in the interview! I have always found PAs to be informative, helpful, encouraging and genuinely interested in my child and my concerns. Just a thought. Keep up the great work, Mama (wife, professor, colleague, daughter, etc.)! P.S. Thanks for your blog.

    • Abigail

      Thanks so much! So glad you enjoy reading. I really relate to your comment; breastfeeding is way harder than I expected. It’s taken me about 4 months to feel like it’s finally (sort of) going smoothly. And that’s mainly because I adjusted my expectations. And stopped looking at the clock! (Oh, and I also stopped waiting for my baby to sleep through the night. Clearly not gonna happen any time soon!)

  4. Kayin

    Lol… I had such a similar experience at Anaya’s 4 month checkup not too long ago. We might have the same pediatrician : ) I held it all together until we hit the car and then had such a break-down. I already knew Anaya wasn’t getting enough milk but once the doctor confirmed it I was just heart broken. Anaya was in less than the 10% which had dropped since her two month appointment and I already knew my milk had decreased. For the next month I pumped that girl full of avocado, coconut oil and had to start taking special “mama milk” pills to produce more milk and I am happy to report we are all doing better. Oh the break downs that with breastfeeding- there is so much pressure!

    • Abigail

      You are SO right! There is so much pressure. I think it must be both external and internal, too. There must be some crazy breastfeeding hormones, because I feel like I have NO emotional defense in that area. I had to turn off an episode of Call the Midwives the other day, just because there was a hungry baby separated from its mother, crying. Couldn’t handle it. And any time I spill breast milk, or have to throw it out, I feel so disheartened, even though my body can just make more. This stuff is really difficult to navigate. Glad things are going better for you now; that must have so devastating, but you tackled it and powered through. You rock. And your baby is gorgeous.

  5. Erin Wood

    I have the same feelings about pediatricians. I had the best PD with my middle two kids and then she retired. She was so calm about everything. Never made me feel like things were bad. When I had questions, she gave me great suggestions on things to try. Never once did she look at me weird as if she had never heard of that before…like other PD’s I had had. I always walked away from my appointments, with her, feeling at peace. I would suggest asking other mommy friends if they like their PDs because that’s how I found my favorite PD. She came with high recommendations from a lot of friends.

    And my babies never had the rolls either. My first one I was so worried about it and ended up giving up breast feeding at 3 months. He is now 9 years old and he’s still tall and skinny. He will be the kind of guy that can eat a whole pizza and never gain any weight. He’s still tall for his age and weight wise on the low end (percentage wise) but can eat more than I do at meal times. After him I realized babies don’t have to have the rolls to be healthy. If they pull off the breast and aren’t screaming for more food, then they are fine. All my babies were speed eaters (5 minutes on each side). If they’re active, then they are getting enough. I just figured I must have the skim milk version of breast milk.

    Also 2 of my 4 did the eating strike thing…both at around 2 months. One went 7 hours. The other 3 days. With the second I was pumping and giving her breast milk from a bottle until finally she decided she would BF again. Still to this day, I have no clue why.

    As one mom to another, know that you are doing a fantastic job taking care of your little guy and loving him well. He looks completely healthy. Those cheeks say it all! :o)

    • Abigail

      I would LOVE to have a PD like that. That’s what I hoped for and expected, honestly, so it was a little shocking to feel FAR more anxious AFTER the appointment than I was going into it. And what you describe sounds so much like what I am experiencing with Julian. Maybe it’s just these Rine genetics!?! So encouraging to hear.

  6. Laura Collins

    He eats this way because of his extreme intelligence. There is too much to observe and contemplate during the day so he eats enough to take the edge off his hunger while at night there is much less stimulation, so he loads up in order to make it through the interesting day ahead. Be proud of your snacking, skinny kid!

    As for traumatizing comments from medical experts….yeah. My night nurse told me, when my son was less that 20 hours old, that, “He’ll be sleeping with you the rest of your life.” because I didn’t want her to take him to the nursery. Right there, before I had even diapered him myself for the first time, I had ruined him.

    Put on blinders – look only at your own child and respond to all that he is and he will thrive!

    • Abigail

      So true! He is even more distracted now than he was at two months. He feeds great at night, because there is nothing to do/see.

  7. Sally McGough

    Wonderful post, but Abby, I strongly recommend you and Michael find a new pediatrician. It’s hard enough being a new mom without feeling undermined by the very professional who is supposed to be helping and supporting you. Talk to people, interview pediatricians, and find one you love, who also loves babies — all kinds of babies — and has lots of experience dealing with them and their anxious parents. I’m tempted to say, find one who is also a mom (because my children’s first doc was, and that gave us wonderful common ground), but I’ve also had good experiences with male pediatricians, although come to think of it, they were all also dads . . . . Of course, the fact that a pediatrician is a parent is not necessarily a guarantee of a good rapport — for all I know, your current pediatrician has 6 happy, healthy kids (although I can’t help wondering how their self-confidence is!). Anyway, pediatricians come in all sizes and shapes, just like moms and babies, and I bet you can find one who at least doesn’t make you feel like you’re doing it all wrong, when in fact you’re doing a great job. Just what you needed — a new job assignment!

    • Sally McGough

      OK, my earlier post seemed a bit heavy-handed to me when I re-read it, and now I feel guilty, like I’m telling you you’re a bad pediatrician-chooser and you’ve got to fix that on top of everything else going on in your life! Not what I meant or what you need. Maybe you can make it work with this pediatrician, and you’ve got some other great advice above from others about how you might do that . . . . Whatever you do, I’m sure it will be fine, and clearly Julian is thriving!

      • Abigail

        Don’t feel guilty! We didn’t actually “choose” this doctor; she was randomly assigned through our HMO. We have the power to switch if we want, though, which I am definitely thinking of doing, especially after reading so many of these comments.

    • Abigail

      I think you’re right. The last visit went much better — but mainly just because I didn’t ask questions or describe Julian’s behavior in detail. I just sit back and shut up. And it would be nice to have a doctor who can field all my anxious new mom questions!! Still, I’ve heard that finding a PD who is knowledgeable about breastfeeding can be hard.

  8. Kathy

    Maybe because I never had the opportunity to breastfeed…but I laughed my ass off on this one! And I must say…should the day come (God forbid) when you have to pick an oncologist, they can make this pediatrician look like a saint of compassion.

    • Abigail

      Happy to entertain you, Kathy! It was supposed to be humorous, even though it was a pretty horrific experience. I tried to tell the story as I felt at the time, which makes me a bit of an unreliable narrator. 🙂

  9. Elise

    My now 1yo son also would never feed for longer than 5 min. at a time. I couldn’t even imagine getting him to nurse from both sides in one feeding! At 2 months he definitely didn’t sleep “well” at night…what the heck does that even mean?! I actually just recently read an article written by an anthropologist that it’s actually natural for babies to nurse for short spurts more often (every 20-30min.) rather than the “normal” 20 min. every 2-3 hours that’s touted by baby books and pediatricians. When I read that, I stopped trying to encourage my son to eat longer (he definitely is growing just fine). It makes sense as nursing is not JUST for nutrition but also for bonding (a baby doesn’t necessarily need to EAT every 20-30 minutes but he does want reassurance that his mommy is there and available and attending to their needs that often).

    • Abigail

      That sounds exactly like Julian! At least his daytime eating habits. At night he totally tanks up with leisurely feeds. It’s always refreshing to hear that other babies do this, too. I remember frantically googling things like “short nursing session” and “only nurses for 5 minutes” two months ago…

  10. trishasuzanne

    As I read this I am rocking my little guy (who lately will not let me put him down in his crib for naps) and worrying that I am ruining his life by not enforcing a stricter nap regimen. New mama anxiety is the worst. It’s just nice to know we’re not alone in it!

    • Abigail

      Ugh. Don’t even get me STARTED on naps!!!! That is my new mom anxiety of the moment! I’ll have to write on that soon. I would have much more time for writing if the little guy would actually nap for more than 20 minutes…!

  11. dominique

    I agree with everyone who’s said you need to find a new pediatrician. If you were in northern Arizona, I could give you a recommendation but it doesn’t seem to me you are in this area. I cringed reading about spilling your breast milk all over the bathroom rug. I can’t imagine. The most I’ve ever spilled was an ounce after pumping in the car and I was upset with myself all day. I agree with your nuggets of wisdom except in a few situations. My 9 month old would nurse for hours on end in the middle of the night if I would let her. I know she is just doing it because she wants to be close to me and sleep while being held. In those situations, I do watch the clock and unlatch her after 10 minutes on a side. We learned early on that if our baby wasn’t done eating, she would let you know in no uncertain terms.

    • Abigail

      Ha, definitely a good reason to watch the clock. And it is funny how emotionally attached I feel to breast milk, even though my body is constantly producing it. Any waste just seems tragic.

  12. lisbypenelope

    I am not a pediatrician, but I do work with infants nine hours a day, five days a week and I just wanted to share a little knowledge I have accumulated over my time as an infant teacher:
    1. Every single parent believes they are inadequate, their baby is going to be negatively affected for the rest of it’s life, and if they were only a better person they would’ve been able to prevent EVERYTHING TERRIBLE from ever happening.
    2. If you are a parent who can identify with the above statement, you are doing a GREAT job! You love your child and are doing everything you can to meet his/her needs, this is an incredible accomplishment and one that should be remembered for the entirety of this child’s life (and the life of the parent).
    3. Your baby will make it very clear when they’re needs are not being met, i.e. if they are starving, they will not stop eating. Women have been raising they’re children without the guide of a pediatrician for thousands of years and our species is not yet extinct so something is going right…
    4. When your child is 13, no one is going to ask questions about their infancy, such as,
    “How well did you breast feed?”
    “When did you first crawl?”
    “What were your first words and how old we’re you when you said them?”
    5. There is way too much information in this age and it is causing an epidemic of shame among parents (not to mention depression, anxiety and addiction), we need to do our best to encourage those parents around us and share our stories (as you are doing with this magnificent blog) to help other parents out of shame and help ourselves out of it as well.

    • Abigail

      Great stuff. Especially the idea of how saturated we are with information. At any time, I can google something and find a website that will tell me I’m “doing it wrong” and potentially ruining my baby’s life, etc. And #4! So true. Thanks for the perspective.

  13. Maria

    I love this post, but…. it’s not recommended to give immunizations to babies not feeling well. Obviously should have been discussed by said pediatrician who, in poor form, was probably trying to assess that. That being said, I would look for another health care provider, md, pa, or np that has a better bedside manner. I’m thrilled everything has turned out well. I’m still exclusively breastfeeding at almost 7 months, and it gets do much easier! And btw the shots are not worse at 6 months, they are the exact same.

    • Abigail

      Well, Julian was feeling fine, aside from being cranky for missing a nap. He didn’t stop eating until after the shots, and even then he was happy as a clam. I, on the other hand, was a basket case!!

  14. Mommy V

    Ugh… Girl, that is the WORST feeling. Somehow, we accidentally stumbled into the office of the world’s greatest pediatrician when Micah was born. She is one of the few people in the medical world that doesn’t make me feel pressured to do things that feel instinctively wrong… She helped me work out alternate vaccine schedules when two of my kids reacted badly. She is intrigued by some of my not-so-standard parenting decisions. (She actually asks me questions and listens to my thoughts about things like infant potty training and using apple cider vinegar as an anti-fungal… WHAT?!?!) Sometimes we disagree, but it’s amazingly ok… I hope that some day you find somebody like that. And fall in love. HA! (I’ve always thought that searching for a health care professional that I can trust is like… dating all over again. Awkward and desperate and usually embarrassing. HA!)

    • Abigail

      SOOO jealous. That’s even better than my Dr. Quinn fantasy. It sounds like you have freaking OPRAH for a pediatrician!!! (And apple cider vinegar is magic.)

  15. Diana

    I can seriously relate! When my first was born, they said breastfeeding shouldn’t hurt, but it did (really bad) and then I got mastitis at about 2 or 3 months in and things cleared up after that. Discovered after the fact that my mom was allergic to Lanolin (guess who is too?) so all that nice Lanolin to make things heal up faster was making it WORSE. When I got mastitis they gave me cream for the possible yeast infection and that worked wonders. Now I use olive oil. And I never, ever (mostly) ask my doctors things. It always seems like they have either 1) their own agenda (like: you should have this baby early because I want to not get up in the middle of the night!) or 2) weird ideas of normal. I’ve had a child that ate every 45 minutes for 45 minutes at a time, a child that ate every 2 hours for 10 minutes, and a child that ate every 45 minutes for 10 minutes. Normal? What is that?? Sometimes I think moms have the most guilt out of everyone.

    • Abigail

      You had an unknown allergy to Lanolin?!??! What a nightmare! That’s always the go-to suggestion for nipple issues. “Just put lanolin on it.” Yikes. And I’m totally with you on the “normal” thing; I only have one baby so far, but already it seems like his “normal” shifts on an almost daily basis.

  16. Susiemessmaker

    Breast feeding was never easy for me and I always envied those new moms who were amazingly mobile in their feedings of their blissful children as well as the ones who said they just slept at night while their babies ate (my baby didn’t do the laying down feeding thing). As I anticipate breastfeeding an infant again (in a month or so), I still have anxiety about it, but I am comforted by the fact that my first kid is mostly okay!

    • Abigail

      Your first kid rocks. And it’ll be interesting to see if breastfeeding is any different with the second baby. I’ve wondered about this myself; will I have trouble with the next one, too? I suspect I will, because I think one of the reasons I’ve had issues with the one side is that that nipple is way longer than the other one. I do not have symmetrical boobs. Sad face.

  17. Christine mlab

    I had a pediatrician like this until my son was almost 12 mo. I was such a nervous mom that I felt like I was in the wrong, not her. The last straw was that she scared him so much with her brusque manner that she did not get to see whether he could stand/walk, and wanted to schedule another appt. She also tsk-tsk’ed me because his poor leg had a little pinch mark from the car seat buckle. Am I really the only mom who ever had that unfortunate accident? I left there whispering to my son, “You will never have to come here again.” The next pediatrician was great, and we still go to her. Good luck!